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Star Trek (2009)

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1/10: The Worst, Stupidest, Star Trek...
Sunday, May 10, 2009

The Worst, Stupidest, Star Trek of All Time Sirs: I so much wanted to like, no, love this movie.Instead, without giving away too many spoilers (there are a few here), it was simply awful. What Paramount delivered was an ADHD addled mess; one that completely destroys the source material from which it came. I understand that for the uninitiated, they (Abram's and company) can do what they like; and they have done so, I believe, for the sole purpose to be able to 'dumbly go where no worse hack writers have gone before' and henceforth dish out more tripe in the name of Star Trek while absolutely violating over 40 years of franchise history. You can laugh at that, and tell me to get a life, but if you are going to put the name of 'Star Trek' on a film, you need to do damn well better, and stay light years truer, than this crap. 'Superman Returns...

3/10: Gene Roddenberry is Rolling in...
Tuesday, May 12, 2009

Gene Roddenberry is Rolling in his Grave I'll start my review with the disclaimer that I am indeed a hardcore Star Trek fan. The Trekkie in me wanted to give this a rating of 0/10, but I gave it a 3/10 for a few reasons: Good acting, good special effect, good action.If those things are what you look for in a movie like this, you'll probably rank it a lot higher! From a Trekkie point of view, this movie was awful! Even for a parallel universe (which is a cop-out), I have HUGE issues with the movie. Starting with plot holes and writing issues:* When children tease other children, they do it to feel superior. It is an emotional thing to do. So the Vulcan children that were teasing Spock, trying to get him to show emotion were doing so out of emotion themselves.* Sarek (Spock's father) was one of the most logical...

2/10: Disappointing I'm afraid that...
Wednesday, May 6, 2009

Disappointing I'm afraid that's a big thumbs-down. Before I begin, I should fess up to being a dedicated Star Trek fan and Trekkie for nearly 15 years. And as to my viewership of the current output of the JJ Abrams/Bad Robot stable, I thought LOST Seasons 1 was amazing, and have stuck with the show despite a huge drop in quality. Fringe, co-created by Abrams, Alex Kurtzmann and Roberto Orci, has the dubious distinction of being pretty much the only TV show on which I gave up, mainly because I couldn't stomach such appalling writing. As the credits rolled on this Trek film, and listed Orci and Kurtzmann as writers, it all made a disappointing kind of sense, as these three guys have never met a contrived and incoherent plot they didn't love.Unfortunately, 'contrived' and 'incoherent' describes the plot of this movie all too accurately. I will freely admit that there's...

2/10: The character of Captain Kirk...
Friday, May 8, 2009

The character of Captain Kirk reduced to a juvenile delinquent or 'Fast and Furious' redone with Starships. I was eagerly anticipating this release for the last few weeks and went to see it opening weekend. The first scene started out with a well done space battle but things immediately started to deteriorate when the battle turned out to be the birth scene of James T. Kirk, an unnecessarily overly dramatic writing of Kirk's birth. Things didn't improve when we next met the orphaned Kirk racing around Iowa and recklessly destroying his uncles antique Corvette. Very out of character for the command officer James T. Kirk we know from the series. As a matter of fact I doubt that those familiar with the series are the intended audience of this film as the aforementioned scene seemed merely and excuse to throw in a classic muscle car and a song by AC-DC.Throughout the movie James Kirk behaves like...

1/10: boe_dye sez: how about...
Sunday, May 10, 2009

boe_dye sez: how about now we reboot the star wars saga in an alternate reality where Padme doesn't die... *****SPOILERS BEGIN HERE******** Words cannot describe how utterly disgusted I am at this. The teasers were right, this ain't yo daddy's star trek. This isn't even my Star Trek.This isn't even Star Trek and has no business being called Star Trek. Oh sure the names are there, and yes it's glitzy and expensive with lots of explosions...Spocks mom dies...for the really hardcore, there is a reference of Cardasians...OH yeah, and there is Uhura making out with Spock on the transporter pad, and before that asking him if, and I quote "just tell me what you want of me and i'll do it" in a turbo lift as a way to console Spock after Vulcan had just been destroyed. What a way to make Uhura a cheap thrill ride...It...

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