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The Children (2008)

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Movie Cast


4/10: Below average I'm fairly...
Sunday, March 14, 2010

Below average I'm fairly easy to please with horror movies. I don't ask for artistic perfection, just some passable entertainment. If I laugh instead of flinch, then okay, that's entertainment too. But this movie made me do neither.First off, it was quite slow. What I suppose was intended to be suspenseful build up was simply 30 minutes of directionless boredom waiting for a plot to become apparent. Then even once the action got started, there was still parts that simply seemed to be time filler.Several of the violence scenes are pure chaos. Essentially just wild shaking camera movement, with some flashes of objects being knocked over, a few flash frame close-ups of someone's eyeball, or a twirling lawn ornament, and then when the camera shaking stops....someone is hurt or dead. Hmmm, okay.But the most irritating aspect throughout the entire movie was that the parent's actions and reactions rarely make much...

1/10: The 268 To Hampstead How...
Friday, April 3, 2009

The 268 To Hampstead How anyone can give this more than a 1 is beyond me. I guess it depends on what you're looking for on a cold day in April.If you like single shot close ups of objects fluttering in the breeze, blood seeping into snow, middle class screamers and the occasional screaming brat then this is the film for you. Lots of dead staring and vomiting; my guess, to show that the kids have some sort of virus I believe - although this is never explained in any way or form in the film. But the clue would be in the amount of vomit left by each child (missed by all parents throughout the film) which has its affect one by one as the brats turn into Mac wearing make up freaks.The clue here is... when you see miniature people running around in shiny plastic jackets (Don't Look Now) you run for your life. You...

1/10: Wow that was a waste...
Thursday, June 24, 2010

Wow that was a waste of time This movie was drier than the Sahara Desert in the summer. No back story as to how these kids got the killer virus. Don't waste your time on this piece of crap movie and pray they never make a sequel. The plot (if you can call it that)of this movie is about a family who goes to visit their extended family over the holidays and the kids all come down with this "mysterious" virus that turns them into miniature homicidal maniacs. The only one not sick is the teenager who at one point in the movie gets blamed for what is happening with the kids. The ending is confusing as hell. Not only was the plot poor but so was the writing. The only reason I watched this was because I read an article online stating it was one of the most disturbing movies. The only thing disturbing was how bad...

5/10: "I'll turn this car...
Thursday, January 9, 2014

"I'll turn this car around"...and watch something else next time. I see a lot of people liked this flick but I'm really not sure why. I didn't hate it, I won't go that far but this movie just didn't seem very believable to me, too many dumb or just plain weird actions or reactions from the main characters that left me sneering and halfway chuckling sometimes when I was supposed to be frightened (I guess). The acting wasn't a problem although Hannah Tointon had a shocked and appalled look on her face for half the film which was kinda annoying but I'll give her a break since she was being hunted by toddlers for her pelt. Anyway I didn't think it was awful but I probably won't watch it again, just one man's opinion though so maybe u will feel differently.

7/10: The Real Review Being a...
Thursday, April 2, 2009

The Real Review Being a Horror Film person I have seen them all and was not expecting much from the trash that is flushed out to us. But I'm pleased to tell you that this movie was a nice surprise. The plot was basic, the characters were believable, and the movie had a nice pace. To most the premise itself seems to have been done before but No it has not the way that this film does it. All is revealed in this film and the cause is actually believable. I would highly recommend this film to anyone that enjoys horror films. The people that got on to give this one a low score obviously know nothing about the genre and need to go rate movies like High school musical or Paul Blart the Mall Cop. Official Chickencow post unaffiliated with any Film Company

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